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that's over
February 21, 2011
We had the memorial service and luncheon for Spouse's mother yesterday, and it went fairly well, considering.
Considering what? Well, considering the weather was for crap (freezing rain/sleet/snow), the "meeting room" turned out to be a gym, we had to fight with the management to let us serve the luncheon...and, of course there was the little matter of the fact that she was a person that no one really liked.
But we all managed, to varying degrees, to keep our shit together for a couple of hours. I make no secret of the fact that I was there for her sons and her grandchildren, and not for her. JR was appreciative of everything I did, and he was the main person I was doing it for, so that's that. I will help him with the thank you notes, and put the photo album back together, and see if there is anything else he needs, but I am really glad the bulk of it is over.
I hope JR can get through his grief and start having a life now; he really deserves it.
I don't know what P&E's problem was yesterday, but they both seemed ultra-super-pissy. Personally, I'm not even too interested. There isn't one of those boys--Spouse included--that ever got lesson one in how to behave in a civilized fashion when they were growing up. When something crawls up their butts, they react in just the same, anti-social, passive-agressive way as their mother always did. And after putting up with that family and their fucked up dynamics for over 27 years, I have pretty much decided that Hey! Que sera sera, and I am no longer wasting energy on trying to deal with any of them when they get the sulks.
Honestly--some days, it feels like every single person in my life just coasts lazily along, letting me do all the heavy lifting, relationship-wise. And you know what? Just...NO.
So. Smoking. Can someone tell me how I can wake up from a nap that was induced by a smoking-cessation self-hypnosis session, and my first semi-coherent thought is "I want a cigarette"? I'm doing okay, though I seem to be stalled at 1-3 a day. And although I get obsessive to the point where I cannot stand it one more minute, As soon as I have one? It seems kind of pointless. Which is a good thing. Moving forward, right? Big milestone this morning, when I went to the gas station to fill up the car, and DIDN'T buy a pack.
Reading:Hobby--"Hildegarde's Home" (1892), by Laura E. Howe Richards. 3rd book in the Hildegarde series. And I found another of Mildred A. Wirt's Penny Parker books--"Swamp Island" (1947).
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Surfing: .
Listening: Red Hot Chili Peppers, Neko Case, The Animals, The Rolling Stones.
At Random:
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