Damn. I guess I can�t complain too much, because the weather has been behaving reasonably. But it is foul out there right now. The wind is howling, it is frigid, and sleet is coming down.
In other words, it�s November in Wisconsin.
I worked on my bead box yesterday. It was a shambles. (Now it�s only a mess.) I was hoping that if I tidied things up a bit I�d feel like beading. No luck so far, but you never know. I think I feel like getting into it, but then I start to go through the beads, trying to put something together, and it just doesn�t happen. I don�t feel any inspiration.
This has been going on pretty much since my brother died in February, and I�m scared that I won�t ever get it back. I�d hate that. I feel like all the joy gets stripped from my life. I don�t want to lose my beading.
Something else that seems to be fading out of my life is reading. I�ve abandoned several books in a row recently, as I�m having a hard time getting engaged. And what used to be my time to read has become my time to play ball with Mr. B instead. Hence the easy reading I�m doing at the moment, re-reading favorites of my youth.
Finding myself to be (temporarily, I hope) a non-reader is totally alien to me, and it really throws off my whole sense of identity. I�ve been a reader for nearly 92% of my life at this point, and I don�t have much recollection of any time when reading wasn�t my favorite pastime, and something I couldn�t get enough of. I was reading easy reader books when I was four, and pretty much never looked back. It�s who I am.
So if I�m not a reader, who am I?
Well, this is getting to be a downer. I�d better save some of this sturm und drang, if I�m going to do 30 posts in 30 days. Time to lighten things up:
Reading: Louisa May Alcott�s �Rose in Bloom�.
Listening: Youtube: Songs from both versions of �Bedazzled�. Dudley Moore doing �Love Me�, Drimble Wedge and the Vegetations (i.e. Peter Cook) doing �Bedazzled�, and �Inside of You Inside of Me�, from Brendan Fraser�s cut rock star scene. Plus a lot of Dudley Moore playing piano.