who said winter got to come back?
March 16, 2006, 9:34 P.M.
Weather is as sucky as predicted today, but at least the shit held off long enough to allow me a snow-free morning commute.
Afternoon drive-time really sucked, though.
Talk therapy being a highly touted method of dealing with stress and depression, I had a long chat with a friend at work. This person is very much like me, so her work-related pep talk was geared to my personality, and light-years away the last one I received. A lot of what she said was reassuring--mostly because I really respect her opinion, and she has a high opinion of me!
Truly, she is a perfect person to talk to about my uncertainties with the new position:
- She knows me very well. What I'm good at, what I like to do, (NOT always the same thing) what I hate, and the kinds of things I can become good at despite hating them.
- She's had to work for my new boss in the past, and knows what flies and what doesn't there.
- She's had to write the very type of documents I'll be required to produce, and has helpful resources she's willing to share with me.
After talking to her, I really did feel better about things. And I made sure to tell her so, and thank her for listening and being helpful. I could see crying on her shoulder a lot, if it wasn't for the fact that she's leaving tomorrow and will be gone for a month and a half. So that's probably a good thing for her, anyway. So I feel a bit better about the new job. But even worse about the old job, which I'm apparently supposed to continue doing on an as needed basis. I have a sneaking feeling that as needed will pretty much translate to "Do everything you've always done, on top of the new new position we've forced you into."
I just have to keep telling myself that I refuse to give them what they really want. If they want me out of here, they are going to have to kick me out, with severence. I'll be damned if I'm going to quit.
I need to talk to Spouse about getting organized for getting the frack out of WI. What we need to do to pay down debt, fix up the house, and relocate to a climate that won't kill me as fast at this one. I'm going to start by going through the list of bills and trying to figure out what we can live without, what we can pay off, and what we can pay down. I also want to compile a list of small(to start with)fix-up jobs that need to be done around the house before we could even begin to think of selling.
Then comes the hard part--confronting Mr. Lazypants with these lists, and goading him to action. But I'm hoping that if I attempt to get the thinking part out of the way, he won't mind the doing so very much.
This is an attempt to fix myself, really. In little ways by trying to get organized and be functional, and in big ways, by trying to get myself out of a place I've spent the last twenty-six years absolutely hating.
Reading: When I read at all-- "Amanda/Miranda", by Richard Peck.
Listening: XM, "Fungus". The Adverts, The Offspring, Big Black, Snuff.
Beading: My heart still isn't much in it.
One Year Ago, I was busy.
At Random: click here
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