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November 25, 2015

Sideswiped again. I had a great weekend, and then...out of nowhere, a flying tackle from THE BIG D. I feel like I'm being sucked down a hole. I'm getting those all-too-familiar feelings of apathy, nihilism and detachment that foreshadows an episode.

Maybe it's because I have had ZERO restful vacations this year (my vacations were very good for me in other ways, but very taxing to my introvert self). But I am kind of resenting Spouse for co-opting my four-day Thanksgiving weekend to put in a new kitchen floor. The timing may be great for him, but it certainly sucks for me.

Or maybe it's because I have really needed to have a restful vacation this year--I am not happy with the way things are at work, and feel quite helpless to change them, and I'm too insecure in my job at this point to risk speaking up. All that adds up to what the jargon-jockeys call "employee disengagement".

Anyway. Here's the thing--all of a sudden, even the things I usually look forward to at this time of year are feeling like a burden and obligation instead of a joy and a passion. I just see "THE HOLIDAYS" bearing down on me like a freight train, and all I want to do is lay down on the tracks and let them run me over.





Reading:"Ruth Fielding on Cliff Island, or; The Old Hunter's Treasure Box", by Alice B. Emerson 1915 or so, I guess. Not marked.

Listening: meh.

Inked Up: meh.

recede - proceed

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